I miss my Adderall. I have switched to Vyvanse for my own sanity. The Adderall had a speed/crack effect on me. It was great for a while. When I would take it, there would be 3-4 perfect hours of productivity. Unfortunately, the rest of the time was spent obsessively doing useless things.
And no harm if I took a few more than prescribed, that would make me more focused, right? I saw where it was heading, and I did the stupid adult thing and asked the doctor to switch me to Vyvanse.
It is day 4 without it and I have turned stupid. The grass was greener on the Adderall side. I found myself just staring at my computer today with no clue of what I was doing. A few times I thought I had better write something down so I wouldn’t forget it. In the time it took to pick up a pen, I had forgotten what I was going to write.
I asked my friend if I was always this much of a space cadet before. He said, “absolutely.” He reminded me that I used to watch funny cat videos for hours at a time. OMG! He’s right, and I fucking hate cats. He also said that ditsy me wasn’t that bad.
I just finished my lesson plans for tomorrow. It took me twice as long and there was a lot of staring off into space. I got to see how the other normal and productive half live and it was glorious. I’ll give it some time. Maybe I’ll find that happy place that is somewhere between cracked out and cat watching idiot.